is assigned a different meaning to different people. emotionally, however, my desperation comes from the fact that nothing i do seems to change or make things better for myself. trying to hold happiness in the palm of my hand, as if it were water, desperately trying to not let it trickle away. sometimes, we just all lose sight of what we really want in life - and at this moment that’s where i am. just standing on the railroad track waiting for the train to either come smash me to pieces or take me somewhere where i’ll see greener pastures and less rain, and consequently erase me.